Pinkie McNeo was fired by TRINITY last week and new counsel was retained by the Females of SoL. Mrs. Neanderthal will be filling the role as TRINITY counsel. Mrs. Neandy answered reporters questions last Friday explaining the need for change, “Mr. Neo represented the SoL Ladies adequately for 2 years but became distant after the ladies stopped lending him their clothes.” “He stretched them out,” MamaGoose explained “He should just get his own dresses”.
More wedding bells! After only a week as SoL ambassador to ClanPMS, SoL’s Gandeezay is engaged to PMS Fraggi3. Deeze is “over the moon” with happiness according to friend BOO 101. Although it was going around that Deeze had asked PMS Athena and AthenaTwin to marry him as well…a harem for Deeze? A lofty goal to say the least since he first needs to get over that hurdle of being a legal age to marry. When asked to comment Deeze claimed that only Fraggi3 will be Mrs. Deeze. And the twins? “They are just members of my new Xtreme Beach Volleyball team”. We’ll keep our eye on this one.
Cookieman77 was awarded the Purple Heart for sustaining injuries while saving his fellow sailors in an incident aboard ship somewhere in a Pacific port. The story released claims that several sailors were burned when an RPG was fired at them from shore. Cookie apparently threw several of the men out of the way saving their lives. However, in a mysterious phone call, we were told that the sailors were injured when they attempted to take Cookies stash of oreo’s, Glamour magazines and Yoohoo. Their burns, according to the source, were not from a grenade, but rather boiling water and ramen noodles from a hotplate under Cookies bunk. When asked for comment Cookie stated “I have your RPG right here in my pants, if you know what I mean.”
HEAT SIGHTING! Heat Exchanger was seen Oscar night accompanying Forrest Whittaker to the Grand event. Those not “in the know” took Heat for a body guard but friends claim he was attending as a guest. Later that night Heat was spotted at the Elton John Oscar party and was overheard discussing cleaning and assembly of shotguns with Clint Eastwood. He was then purportedly seen at the Vanity Fair party and Governors Ball as well, his good friend The Goof claims that the lure of “all that free Hollywood food” was too much for Exchanger, “he couldn’t NOT attend”. Eastwood wore a tux by Oscar DeLarenta and Whittaker sported a Calvin Klein tuxedo, while HEAT chose a beater, Carhartt jacket and Dickies.